How did I get the way I am?

To whom do I owe my personality, demeanor, sense of humor, etc?

(January 9^th, 2008 / 0 comments)

In my younger days, I used to attend a week-long camp every summer. Recently I was able to make a trip back to camp and that short visit got me thinking of all the memories I had there. In the midst of reminiscing, a name popped into my head unexpectedly - Daniel Hagen.

Daniel Hagen was one of the older kids at camp. He was popular, partly because of his devil-may-care attitude and oh-so-with-it grunge stylings (What? This was the 90's! Back off), but mostly because of his sense of humor and dead-pan delivery of random witty remarks that made him seem elusive and somehow superior, at least to me.

I remember sitting as close to him as I could manage without being noticed, being one of the younger, un-popular crowd. I hung on every mumbled word he spoke. I thought he was the absolute coolest person ever. I wanted to be like him.

Imitation as flattery

I also remember actually trying to be like him. I adopted his mumbles and voice tone. I found an old flannel jacket in a deceased man's leftover belongings and wore it everywhere, regardless of the occasion. I distinctly remember trying to emulate his nonsensical comedic identity and delivery.

Where did I come from?

I've never really thought much about where my personality comes from. I guess if you asked me about it, I would default to saying it's some combination of my parents' personalities, as one would assume they've had a bigger influence on me than anyone else.

But what about the people that I've long-since forgotten about - the people I imitated, the people whose behaviors and personalities I literally practiced in order to be more like them? Are the effects these people had on me still around?

Lingering influences & consequences

At some point, I forgot all about Daniel Hagen and trying to imitate him. But looking back, I can't help but wonder how much of his personality stuck, becoming a part of who I am today, even though I no longer directly attribute my behavior to his.

What's more, have I passed these traits along to other people who may have looked up to me at some point, thus creating a never-ending Daniel Hagen legacy?

Creepy.

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